Hi !  Tick-tock, tick-tock…the year is rushing to its conclusion. Can you feel it? Time to take a deep breath. This week I am thinking and writing about anger, board games, solo trips, unexpected mail, fashion shows and personal websites.- Eve D.❣️

Week in review…

I had a bipolar week. The first half was defined by anger. I was openly angry at the world, and the world knew it. The thing about anger is that it’s all consuming, and it’s creates a self-fulfilling prophecy. If I am angry, the world will for sure hand me more things to be angry about, which is hardly ideal. By Wednesday I had had enough of this nonsense, and addressed it head on. It’s amazing how quickly the body soothes as soon as you give it permission to do so. The rest of the week was then blissful, and actually very productive and rewarding. (And guess what? If you’re blissful and happy, the world will hand you more blissful things to be happy about.). The yo-yo’ing is very exhausting, and I too-often wish life was easier. Urgh.

🥳 At least I had a fabulous weekend. G and I went over to friends to watch rugby (South Africa won!). We ate divine home-cooked Greek food (with my assembled Pavlova for dessert - big hit!), we gossiped and chatted and we even played boardgames (are we old?). We arrived at 3pm and left at 10pm, which confirms that G and I were having a good time because we usually start yawning by 9pm 🤣 . (I think yes, possibly we are old!). Then on Sunday we recovered, went out for breakfast, and watched Grand Prix Singapore (kind of boring, but good background noise).

☕️ As a bonus, I also had an impromptu coffee date with G in the second half of the week, which will always be the best way to spend an afternoon. Definitely need to do more of that.

🎨 I spent too much time sorting out my personal site (eved.co.za), and my “serious” blog (ofrelevance.com) and my serious book site (nomagicbeans.com). Not much content on these yet, but…baby steps. I also revived my “work” newsletter (you can read it here, if you really want to) - I had forgotten how much fun it is to write it, and how fabulous it is to interact with all the replies. It goes out to 5,000+ people, and a lot of the readers write back. I spent a couple of hours yesterday responding to everyone, which was an unexpected use of time but also not unwanted.

✅ Other than that…the usual: Gym (pilates, stairmaster, sauna), coffee (and cake!) with friends and my sister. Found out a friend who emigrated years ago is coming back to visit in December (yay! yay!). Also, for the record: I am sitting in a coffee shop, and have just told the woman next to me to stop screaming into her laptop. If she’s going to have a Zoom meeting, she should do it elsewhere. Honestly. (Yes, I’m that person).

🤳 I promised (myself) that I would take more photos of me..and I took one this whole week. It’s a start. I’ll even share it with you:

Food for thought:

Today’s pearl of wisdom comes from Taylor Swift’s new album, with which I am slowly falling in love. Honestly, Ophelia and Opalite helped me survive the first half of this week. I blared them full volume and reminded myself that I too am just “dancing through the lightning strikes”.

5 Questions to ask

This is so good! Five questions you should ask yourself as a check-in with regards to your relationship. It’s targetted at romantic partnerships, but honestly I think you can use it for friendships or even work relationships. Ready?

1. If someone said you are a lot like your partner, would this be a compliment?

2. Are you truly fulfilled, or just less lonely?

3. Are you able to unapologetically be yourself, or do you feel you need to show up differently to please your partner?

4. Do you like who your partner is right now, as a whole, or do you like their potential?

5. Would you want your child to date someone like your partner?

I sent these to G just to keep him on his toes 😂, and he sent me this in reply:

Apples falling from trees…

Have I ever told you how Apple sent me a free laptop by mistake? Sometime late last year I received a package at work addressed to me by name, and inside was a new (unboxed) MacBook. Very suspicious, since I hadn’t I ordered one. I closed the office up for the weekend and took it home. A couple of hours later I get a very panicked call from the Apple distribution centre saying they had delivered a laptop to me by mistake. I asked how exactly this could happen, and they gave me some sob story about printing the wrong waybill. The laptop was actually supposed to go to a nearby Apple shop where its actual owner was urgently waiting for it. She had sent it for repairs, and was about to leave for NYC in a couple of hours. She needed that computer asap. The manager was dying multiple deaths during our exchange. I considered toying with him for a while, but I don’t think he would have survived 😂 I could have been very difficult about this, but instead I offered to get into my car and drop the laptop at the store. Needless to say the manager was extremely grateful and said he would send me a “thank you” gift from Apple the following Monday. I never heard from him again.

Anyway…guess what? This week, I get another package from the same distribution centre, also addressed to me. This time the box is full of iPhone accessories, clearly meant for the sales floor. It’s been a couple of days, and no one has caught on yet as to what happened (or how). I am patiently waiting, and this time I think I will have some more fun with them. I’ll keep you posted.

Random Thoughts: 

🏆️ If I ever win a Nobel Prize (for literature, obviously), I do hope that I too will be hiking some remote mountains without a cellphone in sight, and will be unreachable for the announcement. Then I’ll know I’ve won at life.

✈️ “Travel companies have reported an increase in bookings for solo travellers, primarily older women, often leaving partners behind to ‘explore on their own terms’.” I totally get it. My Camino (whenever it happens) is motivated by exactly this: forty days of not having to worry about anybody but me, and doing things at my own pace and to my own agenda. It’s not lost on me that the only way I can actually justify this extravagance of time alone is to make sure that everyone close to me knows that I am suffering while taking the break, by walking the 800km with a backpack. Because, obviously, I cannot simply take 40 days and go lie on a beach. That would be too selfish. #womenGuilt Read article here.

👗 I am going to say out loud what everyone is thinking quietly: fashion shows are mad. I think it was Paris Week recently, which is sold to the media as this very elite, aspirational affair where the next big thing that will direct culture will be unveiled. The media creates a frenzy, we are supposed to guess who will be rewarded with a front row ticket, and we are supposed to wish it was us…but the reality is that those poor souls in the front row have to keep a neutral face while shit like this walks down the aisle. Those poor models.

😂 Ha ha ha! I don’t know how true this is, and I also don’t care. But I do have questions. For example: …why rob a bank? Why not just get on a bus and never come back? I think there is a movie script in here somewhere.

I’ve been watching…

We watched F1 this week, with Brad Pitt. It was filmed to be a summer blockbuster, and it delivered on all the tropes that you expect. It’s a long movie (2:40hr) but I didn’t once think it was too long. The pacing is brilliant, and I enjoyed the insight it gave me into Formula 1. I must say, it did help that I have recently watched two real-life races, because I was at least somewhat familiar with the psychology and the logistics of the sport. And, I am happy to report, Brad Pitt is still yummy.

Next week we are watching the newly released sequel to Spinal Tap, which we watched a couple of weeks ago. It will either be brilliant, or a complete disaster. Rest assured, I will let you know! 😄 

Looking ahead…

Not much planned at all for this week, other than head down and focus on work. It’s 64 days before I go on holiday, but in real life South Africa “shuts down” at least 2-3 weeks before that, so not much time at all. And G and I are also hoping to escape to the bush mid November for a quick break. That will be very restorative, if we manage.

Thanks for reading!

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