👟👠 Angry? (#8)

Hi !  Welcome back. I’ve just returned from the Karate nationals where Zac picked up two bronze medals, and am about to go to lunch to celebrate my sister’s birthday. So it’s a good Saturday. Hope yours is too. This week I am thinking (and writing) about one’s purpose, bookshelves of unread tomes, anger, falling skies, fun podcasts and Kate. If you haven’t subscribed yet, you can join here or by clicking the button below. - Eve D.❣️

WEEK IN REVIEW

I’m working on a new project, and I honestly think that “this is it”. It’s like I have lived my whole life to end up at this point, to do the work I am currently doing. I’ll talk more about it in near future, when I have refined the details, but for now let me say that no matter what else is going on in my life, I am grateful for the direction and the meaning that this works is giving me. Even if it never sees the light of day (but it will!) I will not regret a moment of it. I’m doing it as a sideline though, which means that I am now also doing stuff that brings me far less joy, but at least pays the bills. Urgh.

Coincidentally (or not really, since it is related to the sideline project) I was listening to Robert Greene talk about finding one’s purpose and he said that as soon as you figure out what you are really meant to be doing, the Universe will align itself to you, and things will be smoother and almost serendipitous. And that’s exactly how this feels for me. Which means ….and this is important …if something is difficult, and feels like a constant uphill battle, and is not bringing you much joy …it’s not your thing. You’re working on the wrong stuff, and you need to keep on searching. Which reminds me of another quote I heard recently “Distractions often present themselves as opportunities”. Life is hard, but it shouldn’t be that hard.

FUN FACT ABOUT ME:

I obsessively collect books (on bookshelves and on my kindle) and I go into slight existential crises every now and then, knowing that I will never ever get to read them all. I also collect blank notebooks! It used to be that I would never leave my house without something to read, but now that I have a smart phone that’s no longer a problem. However, you will always find me with a notebook and a 10 pens in my bag. Will never leave the house without either. To be fair, I put them to good use. If you ever see me sitting alone in a coffee shop, you’ll also see me scribbling away and planning world domination (or at the very least the contents of the next newsletter 🤣)

GETTING REAL

Unexpressed Anger

I don’t need to know you personally to be pretty sure of one thing: if you are a woman in your 40s or later, you have deep rooted anger inside you that you are probably controlling (much to your detriment). We have no shortage of things to be angry about: unfair mental loads, glass ceilings, past relationships, tiredness, social burdens, sexism, men in general, politicans and Mercury in retrograde. I don’t think I have one friend who has not at one point or another said that they felt like taking a bottle and smashing it against a wall, or turning a dish-laden table upside down or just screaming and screaming and screaming. But of course, most of don’t. We go for a run, or go clean the kitchen. It’s not healthy.

If you’ve ever watched the First Wives Club, you might remember a scene with Diane Keaton who (if memory serves me) plays a demure, jilted wife who is easy going and totally agreeable. But when encouraged strongly by her therapist to release “any anger she might have” she goes apeshit crazy. She is us. (Oh my word…I just found the YouTube clip of the scene…it’s brilliant and so funny. See below.)

So….given that yes, this is us…allow me to entice you with the “Rage Ritual Retreat”. It’s exactly what it says…you (and other women) go into a forest, and scream your head off. With full permission, and support. To be honest, I think I would prefer to do this alone, but can you imagine how liberating it must be to just be able to let loose and shed all the anger??

This is an actual thing. The founder says “When people do this and give themselves permission to release their anger, their capacity for joy actually expands. They’re able to feel more happiness and pleasure, and they go home to their families with more gratitude and ease and peace.” I believe it.

This is both necessary and absolutely hilarious. No really, I laughed my head off watching these women (click below to watch). But like I said…they are all of us. (Oh, also, it’s $4,000 for the retreat, if you need any more reason to scream into the void). You can watch a video of the women screaming here:

PODCAST

I’ve had it

If you don’t have $4,000 to spare on a screaming exercise, you can also just bitch for free. Join @mizzwelch and @pumpspumpspumps on their Instagram account or their YouTube “I’ve had it” podcast, where these two ladies - who are also best friends - sit and literally just talk about things in life that they’ve had enough of. It helps that a) they’re funny and b) they can really laugh, which makes the viewer laugh too. And trust me, you will find yourself nodding in agreement at their observations.

Some previous grievances they’ve aired and discussed:

• Comedy routines from flight attendants during safety procedure (see below!!)

• People who announce their social media breaks

• The racket that is high school graduation

• Convertibles

• Stanley Cups 😆 

Find them on Instagram.

TRAVEL

The sky is falling?

I don’t mean to alarm anyone, but are we concerned about Boeing planes falling - or trying to fall - out of the sky? You probably heard that a plane flying from London to Singapore suffered a casualty when a 73 yr old man died after the plane lost altitude drastically and hit turbulence. What you might not know is that, according to Reuters, as a result of that incident 40 people from the flight remain under treatment, with 22 of them with spinal cord injuries, six with brain and skull injuries and a total of 20 in intensive care. There are passengers who are likely paralysed because their heads hit the overhead bins 🤯 😢 

I’m not scared of flying in the traditional sense, but I much prefer to be on the ground than in the air. Something to do with loss of control, but now I feel vindicated. A pilot once said, in response to a delayed flight, “I’d much rather be on the ground wishing I was in the air, than in the air wishing I was on the ground”. One thing for sure…that seatbelt stays on.

Speaking of flying, and airports, here is an interesting piece of trivia: Kansai Airport, in Japan, has not lost one single piece of luggage in 30 years. It handled 10 million items in just 2023, and if it was “average” it would have lost 76,000 items just that year. But did not lose a single one. Maybe we should all be driving Toyotas. 💪 

WATCH LATER

Please watch this short movie (20 minutes long). It’s beautiful. I don’t want to say too much about it, but it will make you look at your own life a bit differently, and possibly with a tad more gratitude. The Neigbour’s Window tells the story of a mother who has grown frustrated with her husband and her daily routine. But her life is shaken up when two free-spirited twenty-somethings move in across the street and she discovers that she can see into their apartment.

FREE THERAPY

CONNECTIONS

The Portal to the other side of the world

There is a new art installation in Dublin and New York City called The Portal that is an open air video link between the two cities. I am not sure what about it is so catching, but people are enthralled, and I am not surprised. Basically, you can stand on the Dublin side and instantly “connect” with people standing in front of the portal in New York City. There is something near-magical about the fact that you can make the ocean between two continents disappear with just a wave. Now, you might be asking…how is this different from Zoom? Well, in theory it isn’t except that Zooms are scheduled and happen between people who know each other. The portal allows for random connections between random people at random times.

As you can imagine, people did abuse this (mostly on the Irish side 🤣 ). There was indecent exposure, upsetting signs, uncool references to September 11 etc. The authorities had to implement extra precautions (more fencing, shorter hours of operation, more security etc). But overall, the spirit of the overall intent was not thwarted. People who know each other schedule portal meet ups just to wave to each other, even though they could just as easily pick up the phone. That this is so captivating despite the fact that we already have video and audio capabilities via our smartphones is a testament to our yearning for more connection and erosion of boundaries.

KATE

I’m just going to leave this here and say that this is not normal. The wording of “birth family”??? What does that even mean? I’m now at the point of looking for any benefit of doubt I might have hiding under the mattress, and think that maybe she really just wanted a sabbatical from all the bullshit royal nonsense she has to do daily. Or she’s dead. Either way, this is all sad. I really feel for her, but know there is more to this story that they are not sharing.

LAUGHS

Thanks for reading!

That’s it for this week. (Want more? You can find past editions here). I hope you have a great weekend and upcoming week. Please keep sharing /forwarding to your friends/groups 😄 and let me know any feedback (you can just hit reply to this email, if you’re reading it in your inbox).

PS